Politics

Melissa Griffin: ‘Twas The Night Before Cliffmas’

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U.S. Capitol

U.S. Capitol

SAN FRANCISCO (CBS SF) — Twas the night before cliffmas, when all through the House The members were stirring, and starting to grouse, The stock market was steady, the jobs numbers were fair, But the issue of the fiscal cliff hung in the air.

For the Democrats wanted higher taxes for some, And Republicans were split because some wanted none, Boehner’s Prop B had been met with a fight And he found himself wishing the Mayans were right.

With the process a mess and the talks all in tatters, A jolly man arrived to help out with the matter, He landed at the capital mall in a flash, And said, My name’s Santa and I heard there’s a clash,

A bag of toys in one hand and a whip by his side, He bellowed, “You’ll get no gifts if you won’t compromise”

So, more rapid than eagles his coursers they came, And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!

“Now Ryan! now, Norquist! Now McConnell and Boehner!

On, Obama! On, Pelosi! On Sperling and Geithner To the top one percent! To medicare sprawl!

Now slash away! stash away! cash away all!”

And he yelled at the crowd with all of his might, “You’d better get this done, and I mean tonight For if you continue to act like a mob, You’ll find yourself looking for a private sector job”

They heard this and scrambled and announced a new deal So American’s cheered and the markets were healed And I heard him exclaim, ‘ere he drove out of sight, “Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!”

(Copyright 2012 by CBS San Francisco. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.)

 

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