East Bay Student Overcomes Years Of Hardship To Become Family's 1st College Grad
(KPIX 5) -- Raymone Lacy made history for his family in 2016, becoming the first to graduate from college - and not just any college, but the University of California, Berkeley. His degree is in Media Studies, but his accomplishment is much more significant than that.
"To be able to call myself an alumni is something that I've been dreaming about and never thought it would be a reality for so long," said Raymone. "It's a moment that has been a long time coming."
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We first met Raymone seven years ago, living with his mom and his younger brother, Isaiah, who was born with cerebral palsy and epilepsy. Growing up, Raymone was more like a father than a brother.
Watching them together, it was clear he could intuitively sense Isaiah's needs. "I'm his voice," Raymone told us. "I'm his best friend, I'm his protector."
Their mom was and still is the primary caretaker, but growing up, Raymone was her right hand. They lived on government aid.
Caring for Isaiah is a 24-7 job. He can't feed himself or even tell you if he's hungry, so you have to read his non-verbal signals. Loud noises can set off a seizure. But in spite of these demands, what was striking about Raymone was his complete lack of resentment. "Having to take care of him made me who I am … it's taught me to be patient and understanding," he told us.Not something you often hear from an 18-year-old high school senior.
Sometimes if his mother needed help, Raymone would have to miss school. But he never made excuses or complained, and he still managed to keep his grades high.
His teacher is the one who told us that. "When I found out what was actually going on with him. I cried for him," said Heather Keeton. "I cried for him because … nobody knows that he's been through this." Keeton spoke glowingly of Raymone, not just as a student but also as a person. "He's just this full of love, everyday. 'Mrs. Keeton!' Hugs, huge bear hugs, you know."
When Raymone was in 8th grade, his father – who was in and out of their lives - was shot and killed. Raymone talked openly with us about all the other difficulties he faced, but when it came to his father, he was fighting back tears. "There's nothing I can compare to how it feels to losing my father," he said. "Something, a feeling that I try to avoid … something I'm not acquainted with sharing or talking about."
Neither of his parents finished high school, so just getting into Cal was a big deal for his family. He chose UC Berkeley, not because of it's academic reputation, but because he wanted to stay close to his mom and Isaiah.
But college was overwhelming for Raymone, as it is for most first-generation students. It was unchartered territory, with roadblocks he had never had to maneuver. "How to reach out to an advisor in college, how to sign up for the right classes, and you know, knowing that it is okay to change your major," he said. Perhaps most of all, it was hard to ask for help.
National research shows that Raymone's experience follows a familiar and troubling pattern. Almost 40% of the low-income students who qualify for a federal loan will drop out of college. Only 11% of low-income, first generation students will get their degree within 6 years.
Raymone always thought he'd major in computer science, but now that he was studying it on a college level, it wasn't resonating. He felt like he'd be a failure if he changed course, so he floundered. His identity had always been tied to academic success. In college, he lost that feeling. "I felt like my entire sense of self collapsed."
Raymone withdrew for a time, moved back home and attended community college. He had always been self-sufficient before, so he had to learn to ask for help and to trust his support team: his girlfriend, his family, especially his mom. She found other support help for Isaiah's care, so Raymone could focus on his own life, guilt-free. "She said nothing else matters," said Raymone. "All that matters if for you to focus on school, for you to create a life that you want for yourself."
He rebuilt his confidence on a more solid emotional foundation. Then, he buckled down at community college, and with a 3.8 GPA, he was re-admitted to Cal.
He switched his major to Media Studies, which resonated with him. And when he finally was ready to graduate, Raymone wrote on his cap, "NEVER ON SCHEDULE, ALWAYS ON TIME." Perfect.
After graduation, he got an internship at NETVIBES, a start-up software company that integrates information and devices, so it uses both his Media Studies degree and his expertise in computers.
And from now on, Raymone's armed with that college degree. "I think it opens a lot of doors and gives people a measure of who I am," he said. "Not everyone is going to know my story … but they will understand my tenacity and maybe the perseverance that I know how to see things through to the end."
