SAN FRANCISCO (CBS SF) — A San Francisco production company that can’t open its annual Halloween attraction due to the COVID-19 pandemic has come up with a creative seasonal service to offer instead: “screaming” telegrams delivered by terrifying costumed clowns.

Screaming Telegram from scary clowns (

Into the Dark Productions has earned rave reviews for it’s frightening haunted Halloween attraction “Terror Vault” at the San Francisco Mint. Because such public theatrical experiences can’t be opened under current COVID-19 restrictions, the creative minds behind “Terror Vault” have launched a new venture to keep the performers and make-up artists who have been left unemployed by the pandemic busy.

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A seasonal treat that couldn’t me more appropriate during these scary times, the company is offering “screaming telegram” as opposed to traditional singing telegrams.

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“Have one of the terrifying Terror Vault clowns deliver a COVID-safe personalized message to your chosen victim,” the Into the Dark website advertises. “A scary Clown will arrive on-site to surprise the recipient with a song, some balloons, and a nightmare-inducing scream!”

The site says the $50 greetings are perfect for “friend or foe” in San Francisco (no delivery outside city limits available) and can be augmented to include additional treats such as cupcakes, doughnuts or more adult fare like a hand-mixed cocktail or a pack of cigarettes.

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There is a special form on the website that interested parties need to fill out in order to receive a PayPal invoice. Only certain dates in October are available to schedule a screaming telegram.